With a little help from my friends

We have this thing here, when you find a lost hub cap you prop it up against a fence, pole or something in the hope that the owner will see it and get it back. Do you have that where you live?


Anyway, I recently bought a new car (not new, you understand) it came with the worst, nastiest hubcaps you ever saw. I spent the first week joking to everyone that they would have to pay big time to get them off me.



Eventually I had the time to take them off and repaint the wheels a decent silver like uncle Toyota intended. (Mission brown just did not look good)
On our recent camping trip, with the help of a few many beers, my son-in-law and I came up with the perfect way to get rid of them…



I took them for a drive and simply leaned them up against posts, fences and bushes as if they were lost ones. Some poor sad weird madman will eventually pick them up and ruin his otherwise tasteful car with these nasty imports. I’ll keep an eye out for them….I bet they turn up on a Volvo!






.

Copyright Infringement Day

This is a 'float' (which I'm sure it wouldn't..love to try though) Trying hard to look like what it is not!



Don't tell me we don't know how to look after children out here...All behind bars, like they should be!! (repeat serial offenders, 'Excessive Giggling')



Copyright infringement #3612436543B



The big man himself. (skinny man in a fat suit wearing fake beard and polyester suit in an Australian summer)



Here in Australia we have this little custom, I don’t know where it came from but it involves fake snow, fake reindeer and a fake fat bloke in a red suit and fake beard all lumbering down the main street accompanied by various ‘floats’ in 40 degree heat. (105deg F)
For those of you who don’t know, a float is a contraption built onto a truck or trailer trying to look like something completely different, from dinosaurs to fairy castles… I cant look at one of these things without wondering how it would go in a demolition derby …and I’m pretty sure that would attract more enthusiastic onlookers..
This year was no different, bored parents looking on as their kids and grandkids scuttle about grabbing lollies thrown by strangers dressed as clowns. I didn't meet a single adult who was happy to be there…but thousands of kids who were wrapped in every tinsel covered lie.
The aim of the day seems to be to fill every pocket with lollies then fill your belly with Fairy Foss, chips, ice cream and drinks then try to make it home without spraying the inside of the car with partially digested junk food... and while we’re on about the aim of the day there seems to be no end of copyright infringements, one could almost think there seems to be a deliberate attempt to bring publicity by law suit.
But here’s the thing…all year we teach our kids about stranger danger and insist they are careful in everything they do and say…then this one day we encourage them to take candy from strangers and push them forward to cuddle ‘Santa’.
I’m thinking it’s time to cancel Christmas and replace it with something more relevant… like ‘national pelt a stranger with lollies day’.