Saturday, April 9, 2011

Fishing For Dummies

Typical of the many miles of foreshore around Pt Lincoln, nice eh?

The forest where we camped for several days, quiet and full of critters to check the hand sized spider Kev found. (I'd have taken a pic but was laughing too much as Kev crapped himself)

Another bit of the forest, a natural arch.

Port Lincoln from the lookout, really beautiful in Autumn.

The plan was a good one, fishing, camping and Geocaching for a long weekend away with a friend. Now this bloke claimed to be well experienced in camping so naturally I didn’t tell him what to bring, I just told him where we were going, what the camping and fishing places were like and gave him a time and date…
So I get there to find the usual big pile of stuff to load into the car, I didn’t take much notice of what was there, I just crammed it all in. (as you do)
Once loaded up we hit the road with nearly 300km to our first stop at Port Lincoln. I guess we’d done nearly 80km when I realized I hadn’t seen any fishing rods in his stuff… I ask the question and it turned out he’d left all his fishing gear at home including several pounds of rapidly rotting bait on the kitchen table…
Not to worry though, he assures me that he has remembered absolutely everything else.
I commented that they were famous last words…

I've brought only two of my many rods, a few lures and tackle, about a thousand dollars worth all up, he has nothing, so a quick trip to a well stocked fishing shop and he has his brand new $5.00 hand reel with no tackle whatsoever. (Did I mention he’s tight as a fishes arse?)
We sought a few Geocaches and hit the grain loading jetty with all the other tryers.
I did well enough, Tommy Rough, Salmon and a few Leatherjackets came my way in the next two hours but then the Sea Lions turned up and that was the end of our fun. I released everything alive because we didn’t have storage for our catch. He caught next to nothing as his pre-rigged handline had huge hooks. (I ignored his plight)
We found a forest to camp in just before dark, it was only then he discovered he’d forgotten to take most of the food from the fridge before we left home. He had no bread, milk or most of his fresh food, just a few cans. He had no plates or cutlery, only one blanket and no airbed, pillow or warm clothes.
I know you're feeling sorry for him at this point, and thinking I must be a heartless bastard but this is our fourth camping trip and he’s just not learning. He nearly froze to death during the first trip because he only had one blanket then as well, and the one I gave him got rolled up so he could use it as a pillow…because he forgot that too. He woke in the morning covered in frost and unable to walk.
I'd given him camp supply lists…he lost them. Id suggested things he would need so he could add them to his list… he just didn’t.
He grumbled miserably the next day when he had to buy the food he’d left home then continued to winge all day about the cost…
I fished on and regretted not bringing my iPod to drown him out.
I didn’t have it all my way though…my pillow was harder than I would have liked…

During the entire trip he’d caught less than a half dozen fish…sad, suicidal fish!
I’m hoping he actually learned something this time because there's a big camp in a few weeks…another long weekend with 20 to 30 people this time, a big group of family and good friends.
There are two kinds of people in the world…quick learners and Kev..

I’m not complaining…I’m laughing!



Anonymous said...

ohh you could,nt be more right about kev!, every time you both go away you make our day with the stories of your trip, just like this one has!, it will be interesting to see how this next trip goe,s? patricia

Windsmoke. said...

Kev needs a swift kick up the bottom. I suspect Kev wants you to supply everything and look after him like a mother. That's just being a bludger and on top of that it's sheer laziness as well :-).

Tempo said...

Hi Pat, Thanks for the comment. I'm thinking it's time for Kev to camp with you! LOL (Pat is my daughter..D2)
Hi Windsmoke, Kev's been married twice spanning most of his life, I suspect his poor wives did everything for him...but you are quite right, he's never got money on him, always wants the cheapest way a bludger!

Sarah said...

I am called "the man of camping" by my husband who, poor city boy that he is, admits readily that I'm the know-how when it comes to camping.

I usually have the things that others forget to bring but if they can afford my rates they're welcome to use...for a price.

Tempo said...

Hi Sarah, Yeah, Ive been camping since birth. Ive got all the gear but I like to camp very simply myself. This next camp I'm taking just one of everything so I dont have stuff to bludge.

mapstew said...

What a wally!

(I kept hearing the theme from a certain cowboy fillum in me head while I was reading this! :¬) )

Tempo said...

Hi Map, camping with Kev is like a bad comedy... in fact anything he does is a laugh with lots of D'oh! head slaps along the way.

Sofa Santa Monica said...

Stunning photos!