Thursday, December 15, 2011


This PC is about to die, it overheated badly while recently editing a friends very bad video footage from a holiday in New Zealand. 6 hours of vid which took an entire day to edit and burn and cook the motherboard etc. It's going now but for how long?
I have a nice laptop but it does not have my favorite web shit on it, my stories and my pictures... when this one dies I will have trouble posting worthwhile stuff.. (dont you say a word..)
Bear with me...

*I took a cheap package tour across the Bass Straight to Tasmania. I should have read the fine print or at least suspected something when it was so cheap… or when they took us past the big boats and into a small dark yard at the end of the docks.

Sure enough I found myself chained to a rowing bench with sixty other suckers who also thought they were onto a bargain. With the drums beating and the lash snapping around our ears we made our way out into the open sea.

I turned to the bloke next to me “Strewth, I hope they're going to fly us back”

He says: “I don’t think so mate, they didn’t last year”

*I’ve been divorced for some time now so I’m nearly over it enough to tell you the story of how it all came to an end.

We were up before the judge seeking a divorce and after hearing both sides of the story the judge gave his verdict.

He glared down at me, “You have obviously neglected this woman and failed in your duty to her.” He scolded. “I thereby award her the sum of $150.00 per week.”

“That’s very good of you, your honor,” I said. “I’ll try to slip her a few bucks myself from time to time.”

*Fred Farmer went to take some money from the bank, he took a slip from the counter and filled it in before getting in line. When he finally got to the front of the line the Teller noticed that Fred had filled in the form using a pencil. “Sorry sir but you’ll have to ink it over.” And gestured back toward the counter.

Fred took his form and went back to start again.

After a time Fred had made his way to the front of the queue and again presented the penciled form. “I’ve thought it over, and I still want the $50.00.”


Magsx2 said...

Hi Tempo,
Loved all the jokes, but I really liked the Tassie one. LOL.

Symdaddy said...

Only have a short break before going back to work until 10.30pm.

Felling better about it now that I've had a laugh. Ta!

Sarah said...

Quick save all your good stuff before it fries!

Windsmoke. said...

Bonza jokes. Poor fred farmer he is definitely a moo cow short in the top paddock. The divorce one made me smile as i've been there twice :-).

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